Things I almost said,

 Oh hi Bakey! How the crap are you? The end of the week has had a wide range of emotions. I’ll get the shockingly sad news out of the way first. Do you remember Teagan Brown? He was killed Friday night after falling out of Garret Blattman’s Jeep. I’m not really sure what happened, or if there’s any fault. But it rips my guts out. Not that I knew him all that well, it’s more that I have some idea of what his parents must be going through. It must be the most painful, the most shocking, the most horrible thing I can possibly imagine. But I can’t imagine it, I’m scared to imagine it, I never ever want to experience it. Today in priest’s quorum bishop let the young men express themselves. He did and of course I did. You said last week that when someone loses someone that they take comfort in the plan of salvation. Your right so I tried to add that to my comments. Without the plan of salvation life would be so bleak, so pointless. Since my brother passed away my faith in the plan of salvation has been foundational not only to my testimony but literally to my survival. We all go through some grief in our lives, it inevitable. So the Lord has given us this plan so we can have comfort and we can have hope. I think the whole world is looking for that comfort. And for most, it rings true, the light of Christ reinforces it. 

In other sad news, we went to Daniel’s funeral. Daniel is my cousin Sam’s boy who died of diabetic shock. He was 35 years old, never married, no kids. My cousins did a beautiful job with his service. I think Daniel was a bit of a partier, not really active in the church. So a lot of non or less active friends and family members were there. My cousins expressed love and faith. They testified of Christ and the plan of salvation. I think it’s important to always express those things at a time like that. It’s comforting to the spirits of all people, members or not.

On to the fun stuff, at least more fun than the first two paragraphs. Thursday night for young me we went to see one of the boys lacrosse games. It was about what you’d think it would be, but it was fun to learn a little about a new sport. There were only two boys there, plus bishop and I. The weather was perfect, so it was pleasant to be out.

Friday mom had her interview. I was preoccupied with that most of the day because I know how scary it can be. She came home happy, and not too obsessed with all the things she said, so I take that as a good sign. I think it more than likely she’ll get it. I also know how much she loves to teach, so I think it may be a more difficult decision than she knows.

That night uncle Justin threw a surprise birthday party for aunt Selena. You know how I am about parties, especially on a Friday night when I’m the most tired, especially after the viewing for Daniel. But we went. It did cheer me up to be with my sisters, it always does. Your brothers didn’t go because Joey was working and ben didn’t want to go to the viewing. Artie missed them, and I think they would have fun. Artie arranged for a mariachi band and it was really awesome. Mom started to miss you really bad when the played because she figures you hear mariachi bands on a daily basis. I chose not to contradict her. 

I had this thought as I was watching the musicians. In 2015 we came to Aaron and Cecily’s wedding. Uncle Patrick had arranged for mariachis then too. In the seven years since then, he fell, away from the church and from the family. He put his own wife and children through hell. Your aunt patti had the worst, scariest time of it, but she held faith and stayed strong. Artie came back to activity and is doing super well now. Cecily went through all that plus serious health issues. All that and he’s gone. I heard he’s in Thailand following his most base desires. I wonder if he’ll ever come back and I kind of hope he doesn’t. No matter what he’s doing he’s alone. Meanwhile, aunt patti and her kids are hosting a party for the family full of love and joy and faith and the gospel enjoying a great mariachi band. In all trials the Lord will restore what’s been lost, we just need t trust Him and ask Him.

Saturday was that funeral. Before that I went for a walk while mom was at the store. After we met Joe and grandpa and grandma at chili’s for lunch. Grandma is pretty stressed out from aunt Laurie and wade living there, poor grandma. After that we did my all time favorite activity in the whole freaking world — weeding. I made the mistake of letting Ben choose weeding or mowing, he chose mowing. It took me three hours to weed that stupid little triangle garden by the driveway with that ugly tree. I’ve tried to sneakily kill that tree more than once, but no go. I guess I’ll need to grab it by the legs and bash it’s head against a fence post. While I was doing that, mom was weeding 3/4 ths of the rest of the yard by herself. Your mom is a machine.

Today was Mother’s Day and Ben’s birthday. We didn’t make too much of Ben’s birthday because we’re going to try to celebrate on Tuesday with dinner and a movie — dr strange. This morning Ben and Joey made breakfast for mom. They made her requested frittata, which is like quiche without the crust. Quiche is like an omelette pie, only fancy. It was pretty good if I’m to tell the truth. For Mother’s Day, mom got to feed her siblings and their families dinner, what a treat. We all helped how we could. When grandpa was almost in the house his knee buckled and he fell on his back. He was surprisingly non dramatic as we helped him up. Your cousin Mark showed up about then, and he said something like “it’s a good thing I got here!” I almost said, “you’re an answer to prayer Mark!” But grandma was right behind me so I didn’t. His graduation was Friday, I wanted to say, “you know who else graduates at 29? Doctors!” But I didn’t. I did say to uncle Steven when he asked if he could help clean up after we were 99% done cleaning up that he could pick up his kids messes. I thought I would get the stink eye from your mom, but I didn’t. 

Before everyone went home grandma asked us to give grandpa a blessing. Uncle Tim anointed and then asked me to give the blessing. I was genuinely surprised and honored. It came to me that grandpa was fine, or at least as fine as grandpa can be. It also came to me to recognize his legacy as the patriarch of the family. If you think of his conversion in terms of the spiritual legacy of temple marriages, missionaries, children born in the covenant, etc. grandpa is kinda the goat. He will have a place of prominence in the next life. I the same goes for grandma and my dad and my grandparents. My goal is to follow that legacy and not be the weak link.

Tomorrow night we’re going to grandmas to check her sprinklers and do some weeding for Mother’s Day. She’s making dinner for us so I don’t know if we’re actually serving her or not.

It’s been an interesting week Jacob. I’ve been focusing my prayers on your and your efforts. I have full faith in you. 

Love 

Pops